Friday 29 April 2011

A Song For Zuperfliegen

Ann recently posted a couple of songs for Zupe on her blog. You can find them here and here. So I thought I should share a song that has meant a lot to me for many years - well before I ever thought I would have a child, in fact.



It was written by David Bowie for his newly-born son, Zowie (or, more fully, Duncan Zowie Hayward Jones) and I think it's beautiful.

Interestingly, little Zowie grew up to be Duncan Jones, the successful film director of the excellent science fiction film, Moon, and the more-recent and also excellent Source Code.

Also interestingly, Duncan attended the College of Wooster in Ohio while Ann was a professor there. David Bowie attended the graduation ceremony (of course).

Zowie, Zuperfliegen - both 'Z' names. Lots of conceptual connections!

Anyway, here's another (slightly different) version of the song, which was the first public performance. It's from the John Peel Show, June 1971.

He Is Risen! He Is Coming (Home)!

(Continuing with the Easter theme...)

It's A Miracle!

All the people and governmental agencies required to collaborate and work for the arrangement of the oxygen-at-home program and Zuperfliegen's release from the hospital were able to do so in an amazingly short period of time. It's the morning of Friday, 29 April - exactly three weeks after his birth - and the oxygen has been delivered to our home. I will soon be making arrangements to pick up Ann and Zuperfliegen from the hospital and bring them back home to resume our life as a New Family.

The Next Stage is about to begin!

In celebration, I once again share the movie poster - now in it's slightly revised and final form - put together by our amazing friend, Ben Nelson:
From Zuperfliegen

Update on the ongoing Zuperfliegen Experience

But first, are you experienced?
Have you ever been experienced?
Well, I have.

- Jimi Hendrix, "Are You Experienced?"

NOTE: This post is a little weird with regards to time. I started composing it on 16 April - 8 days after Zuperfliegen's birth. But I didn't get it completed and posted on that day; so time moved on and things changed and on 25 April I revised what I had written. But I still didn't get it completed and posted and time moved on and things changed again. It's now the morning of Friday, 29 April - three weeks after Zuperfliegen's birth. So I'm going to finish the post I would have completed on 25 April and that's what you're reading here. I'll follow this with a new post that will bring us up to date. So, back to 25 April:

Hey, Happy Easter! I'm not particularly religious any more - and I consider myself more of a Taoist than a Christian - but in my current troubled times, I find "He Is Risen" to be an uplifting, hopeful thought.

(I'm starting this message in the late evening of Monday, 25 April. Technically, Easter has come and gone - even in the USA - but Australia has Easter Monday (!) as a public holiday. Except this year, because ANZAC Day (kind of like Veterans' Day in the USA) has to fall on the 25th, the public holiday of Easter Monday will be observed on Tuesday! So I think it's still OK to say "Happy Easter".)

I'm not exactly known for prompt correspondence - which I discussed in a previous blog entry - but I've gone even more "radio silent" lately. It's really just a matter of spending so much time on Zuperfliegen - traveling to and from the hospital and spending time with him, trying to take care of what needs to be done for the future, and just plain worrying. Almost everything else has been pushed aside to be dealt with "later".

The Status As Of Right Now: Today was Zuperfliegen's 17th day out in the world, but he's never left the hospital. Ann was discharged from the hospital on 14 April and she and I came home, but Zuperfliegen had to remain in the Neonatal Urgent Care Unit (which probably makes things sound worse than they actually are). The doctors have concluded he has "dysrythmic breathing" and sleep apnea. He has moments when he stops breathing while sleeping, which reduces the level of oxygen in his blood to inappropriate levels. When he comes home, he will have to be on oxygen all the time; so we'll get to deal with that on top of the challenges of being new parents to an infant. The oxygen will be required for at least six months, and possibly for a year or more.

As the hospital has done the testing they need to do, he's ready to come home. But that can't happen until the oxygen-at-home situation is set up; and that can't happen until the bureaucratic wheels grind a little; and that can't happen until Australia opens for business again. (Since Good Friday, Easter Sunday, Easter Monday and ANZAC Day are all public holidays, Australia is experiencing a five-day weekend. That's great for most people, but is just a big hold-up for me and Ann this year.) We'll try to finalise arrangements this Wednesday (27 April) and are hopeful that Zuperfliegen will be able to come home on Thursday or Friday. But there's no guarantee that will happen and it may be next week before he makes it out of the hospital (which means that he would come home after I return to work, despite taking all of April off work to help Ann cope with the new situation). And, "next week" means Tuesday, at the earliest, because Monday (2 May) is yet another public holiday (Labour Day)!

Zupe's problem lies in his brain rather than his lungs. The doctors see this condition a few times each year - though it is more common in premature babies. He keeps getting compared to premature babies, despite the fact that he was born a week after his due date! Many babies mature out of it, and that's what we hope will happen during the 6-12 months he's on the oxygen. However, some children have additional brain abnormalities and/or developmental issues; but these typically cannot be determined until the brain cortex develops more over the next three years. So, we hope that everything will work out fine in the end - and that is an entirely possible outcome - but it's also possible that we'll have more unpleasant news over the next three years.

For news of a more positive bend, I can report that he has surpassed his birth weight and is eating like a champ. He wakes every three to four hours and requests - sometimes quite vehemently - to be fed. This is quite different from his earlier days, and all in a good way. In fact, the amount he has developed in the past two-and-a-half weeks is amazing - and very encouraging! He is alert and seems to be responding to his environment.

A Bit More Of The Story Of How We Got Here: We were originally due to be discharged on 13 April. However, Zuperfliegen had been having difficulty with feeding. He wasn't really taking to breastfeeding (which the hospital strongly encouraged and Ann and I decided was best for him). But we figured that was a process of learning, both on his part and Ann's. Because his need for food was increasing every day (as he grew), we put him on a feeding schedule where Ann would try to breastfeed him and then we would give him breast milk (which Ann had expressed earlier) and then top it up with formula, to make sure he was getting his "quota".

Originally, this was intended to happen every three hours (around the clock)! But since the process could easily take 1.5-2 hours - leaving us (mainly Ann!) only an hour or so to rest/sleep before starting again - we quickly moved it to an "every four hours" schedule. (And even that's pretty crazy!) But the biggest issue was that Zuperfliegen was sleepy/sluggish almost all of the time. Typically, you can just wait for your baby to cry to indicate that it's hungry; but, he had never done that. (He's super-relaxed and quiet, which is great...except that it creates a potentially huge problem with regards to making sure he gets enough food!) So the first part of every session would be rousing Zupe from his slumber, which would often be a difficult and prolonged affair - making it even harder to keep to his necessary feeding schedule.

As you can probably imagine, this was really stressing out me and Ann. We began to think more strongly that something was wrong; mainly because we just couldn't see this feeding pattern as tenable. Much consternation was expressed to the midwives that were attending to us. Eventually, a monitor was attached that measured his pulse and percentage of necessary oxygen in the blood. The latter was frequently dropping to the 80s when you want it to be 100 percent (or at least 95 or higher). More worry, as fears of brain damage and other problems entered our minds. Our paediatrician (I just can't get used to the Australian/British spelling of that word...) felt the situation was OK and just that some babies tend to be a bit sleepy/sluggish and slow on oxygen uptake for several days, but get up to speed as they continue to develop. It was very hard for us to accept this idea, though, as we were due to be discharged (and on our own) the following morning.

Our anguish convinced the midwives and/or paediatrician to call in a pulmonary/respiratory specialist for a consultation. He shared our concerns about the blood-oxygen levels (SpO2 levels, where the "2" should be subscripted, as O2 represents oxygen) and suggested Zuperfliegen be transferred to the Neonatal Urgent Care Unit for overnight observation and extended recording of vital signs, which he was. Though Ann and I were certainly worried about the possible implications of Zupe's condition, we were greatly relieved that our worries were being acknowledged and our child would be receiving much greater attention to his condition. This also meant that Ann and I were given an evening "off" after four days of sleep deprivation and stress.

Zuperfliegen's Sp02 levels overnight (Wednesday-Thursday) tended to trend to the low 90s, and thus lower than we would like. It was decided to do further testing to see if a reason could be found. Over Thursday and Friday, ultrasounds were taken of his heart and his head/brain, an x-ray was taken of his lungs, and various blood tests were conducted. Everything came up normal! In addition, he looked fine and acted fine (albeit sleeping a lot; though babies do that).

The next big (and possibly final) step was to put him in an overnight sleep study. Those are generally scheduled well in advance, so they had to give us "emergency" priority to get us in two days later. Ann stayed overnight with Zuperfliegen after he was hooked up with a bunch of sensors - EEG and ECG and other measurements. That data produced the diagnosis of "dysrythmic breathing" and sleep apnea and confirmed that he would have to be sent home on oxygen. Which meant that we needed to apply through Centrelink (kind of like the Welfare Office in the USA, but more common and acceptable in this more socialist environment) to get the payment in place for the oxygen service so that we could then get it delivered so that we could take Zuperfliegen home. But, as that diagnosis/decision came about just before this long Good Friday to Easter Monday/Tuesday break, there is nothing we can do for five days but wait to fill out and complete the forms on Wednesday when the world starts up again. And, of course, we're spending the days visiting and caring for Zuperfliegen in the hospital.

How I Feel About All This: It's a real rollercoaster of ambivalence! When I first found out about the problem, my mood was very dark. One of my greatest fears regarding having a child is the possibility of serious mental damage that would mean he would need to be cared for all his life. The possibility of that happening with Zuperfliegen touches upon areas of serious fear/depression/despair in my mind.

As time passes, however, I work toward a more realistic/workable (I hope) perspective. I realise that there is always the possibility of A Bad Thing (or Things) happening, but hope and joy and love seem to persist and, generally, things turn out "OK". Or, as I have said/believed for many years: "Life sucks, but is mostly worth living." And it's this overall-weighted-to-the-positive perspective that allowed me to decide to have a child in the first place.

Ann and I are, of course, disappointed that Zuperfliegen has this additional challenge (which means that we have an additional challenge, too). But we are significantly buoyed by his continued development and otherwise good health. So far, it seems that, except for the oxygen/breathing/sleep apnea thing, he's a pretty "normal" boy. And, of course, things could always be much, much worse.

We're also happy that his condition was caught and diagnosed and is being treated. It frightens us how close we came to just being sent home and having things develop without this intervention! The additional ten-plus days of having to travel to and from the hospital has been a drag, but far better than the alternative.

A few other things we're thankful for: The staff of the Mater Mathers' Hospital has been incredibly kind, helpful and competent. It's hard to underestimate how important that is in areas of health! We're also thrilled that we live in a country with an excellent Medicare system and private insurance companies that seem to be very reasonable/supportive (and we don't feel that we have to fight for our claims to be paid; in fact, it all seems to be happening automatically, with the hospital dealing directly with our insurance company). And, it's wonderful that Australia provides 18 weeks of paid parental leave (admittedly, it's minimum wage; but every little bit helps now that we are down to one income) and a year of unpaid parental leave (so that Ann can provide the care Zuperfliegen needs and then eventually return to her job). Socialism is a Good Thing! I'm also thankful that I was able to take all of April off as a "holiday" (ahem) from work and was thus able to focus on these events. (Thanks, Tom and New Horizons!)

We continue to look forward to Zuperfliegen actually coming home....

Saturday 9 April 2011

The Zuperfliegen Birth Photos

Ann and Kevin, just before the cesarean delivery began:

From Zuperfliegen

Kevin and Zuperfliegen just after the birth, weighing and a little bit of clean-up:

From Zuperfliegen

Followed by Ann finally able to see her new son!

From Zuperfliegen

Ann, just after the delivery, in the post-op recovery room:

From Zuperfliegen

Day #2 (his first full day) - Awake and aware!

From Zuperfliegen

We're a happy family!

From Zuperfliegen

Friday 8 April 2011

The Ongoing Birth Of Zuperfliegen Baadasssss O'Brien!

Friday, 8 April, 2011 (Zuperfliegen's 41-week anniversary of embryo to fetus)
(All times are Brisbane Time)

Earlier this week, we decided to induce labour (Australian spelling) on Friday or the weekend if a space could be found at the hospital (Mater Mothers Private Hospital in South Brisbane). Yesterday we were told that there was an opening on Friday (today).

7:30 AM - We got to the hospital for our 7:00 appointment. Just a little too much to do in the morning, so we had not left on time...

8:30 AM - The doctor arrives. (Guess it wasn't such a problem that we were late...) Ann is dilated to 3 cm and fully effaced. Her waters are "broken" and they start the administration of syntocinon. Afterwards, Kevin is exhausted from not getting enough sleep last night - trying to get too much stuff done on the computer in preparation of leaving home for four days - so he takes a nap in the chair. (First step of any big project: take a nap!)

10:00 AM - Kevin wakes up, feeling totally refreshed. Ann is having mild contractions every three minutes.

11:00 AM - Ann says "It hurts." (But she's really taking it well, I think!)

11:15 AM - Ann says "I'm no longer smiling...!" Things are getting serious. Time for Kevin to get off the damn computer!

11:45 AM - Ann is feeling a lot of pain. Only 4 cm dilation. Drat! An epidural is requested.

12:01 PM - The epidural is applied. A short time later, Ann is feeling much better (that is, much less pain). Now it looks like we just have to wait a number of hours before something else happens. Kevin eats some lunch. Ann's not feeling hungry.

1:00 PM - Time for a nap for Ann. Kevin will either browse the web or nap, also.

(And then it took me about six hours to get back to the computer to tell the rest of the story...)

1:30 PM - Ann is relaxing and I'm doing web/blog stuff. I frequently look up to check on the monitor showing Zuperfliegen's heart rate. I notice that he keeps going down below the preferred range (110-160 beats per minute). I point it out to the midwife, who has already noticed it. She has Ann try a variety of positions as that often affects heart rate. Nothing really seems to make a big difference. There's a thought that maybe Ann has rushed to the next stage. The midwife does an exam and declares that Ann is almost entirely dilated at 9 cm! Golly! About this time, the doctor comes in and does another exam. The issue is that Zupe hasn't moved down into the pelvis as far as he needs to - probably because of his "freakishly large head" (true) - and the level of syntocinon seems to be stressing him.

1:45 PM - The doctor decides that we need to move to an emergency cesarean! Suddenly, the room is awash with a bunch of new people, all moving very quickly! I see Zupe's heart rate "crash" a couple of times - which was scary - though it's not clear what's happening because they are also disconnecting Ann from the monitors. Ann needs to sign a consent form; I read it over quickly, just to be sure. (It was all fine.)

2:00 PM (or thereabouts) - Ann (bed and all) is wheeled from the room to the operating theatre. I'm rushed along, as I'm able to be with her during the operation, but I have to quickly grab any valuables (like this laptop) to store in a locker, as well as change into sterile scrubs. When I eventually get into the room, they are about to start. I'm given a chair by Ann's head. She's totally conscious, because they're using a local anaesthesia for the lower part of her body. They put a sterile cloth screen up below her neck and we're not able to see anything! I feel disappointed, as I was looking forward to the new "life experience" of witnessing a live operation. Overall, the event is scary for Ann and I - things are moving fast and there's a lot at stake - but we reminded ourselves that C-sections are done all the time, frequently as voluntary procedures.

2:47 PM - NEVER A DUDE LIKE THIS ONE!

Ladies and Gentlemen of The World, I present to you: Zuperfliegen Baadassss O'Brien!

Legal Name: James Steven Victor O'Brien
(obviously, it was, indeed, a boy!)
Weight: 3340 grams (about 7 pounds, 6 ounces)
Length: 54 cm (21.25 inches)
Head Circumference: 38 cm (15 inches; "freakishly large")

Wow, babies are messy-looking when they first come out. My first thought was "blood-covered zombie!" Nonetheless, he cleaned up nicely and got a 6 (out of 10) on the APGAR scale upon emergence and then a 9 after he was pampered a bit by the paediatrician. Apparently, no one ever gets a 10... In the 90th percentile already; that's my boy!

THEN, A LITTLE LATER - We got whisked out of the operating room fairly quickly. Then we just hung out in the post-op for a little while, as Zuperfliegen and Ann were looked after - checking that they were recovering nicely from the procedure (which they were). After about an hour, we were taken up to our (private; yay!) room.

Mother and son (and father) are all apparently healthy and feeling OK! (As of 8:30 PM, anyway.)

And so The Adventure continues!

(Pictures to be posted tomorrow in a new, separate blog entry, most likely.)

Tuesday 5 April 2011

News Flash! - We've added another name!

First: No baby yet. Everybody is happy and healthy, but Zuperfliegen is not yet ready to leave the warm comfort of the womb for the cold joy of the rest of world. It will happen sometime between now and Monday, 11 April; because the doctor will induce labour by then if it does not start naturally. We'll let you know when something happens, of course!

Second: News Flash! We've added another name! (Because we felt that our son didn't have enough already...)

Specifically, we've added a second middle name: Victor. So his full legal name will be James Steven Victor O'Brien. (We're still calling him Zuperfliegen, though!)

There was some discussion about whether Victor should be the first "middle name" or the second. I was torn, because I like the SOB initials (like my own); but, in the end, I felt that Steven deserved the greater prominence.

Victor is in homage to Ann's first cocker spaniel (the one before Zelda). You can read about her great love for him on her blog.

Of course, as a geek, I can't name my son after the dog without thinking about Indiana Jones:



Apparently, Ann and I believe in naming children the same way that cats are named:

T.S. Eliot - The Naming Of Cats
The Naming of Cats is a difficult matter,
It isn't just one of your holiday games;
You may think at first I'm as mad as a hatter
When I tell you, a cat must have THREE DIFFERENT NAMES.
First of all, there's the name that the family use daily,
Such as Peter, Augustus, Alonzo or James,
Such as Victor or Jonathan, George or Bill Bailey--
All of them sensible everyday names.
There are fancier names if you think they sound sweeter,
Some for the gentlemen, some for the dames:
Such as Plato, Admetus, Electra, Demeter--
But all of them sensible everyday names.
But I tell you, a cat needs a name that's particular,
A name that's peculiar, and more dignified,
Else how can he keep up his tail perpendicular,
Or spread out his whiskers, or cherish his pride?
Of names of this kind, I can give you a quorum,
Such as Munkustrap, Quaxo, or Coricopat,
Such as Bombalurina, or else Jellylorum-
Names that never belong to more than one cat.
But above and beyond there's still one name left over,
And that is the name that you never will guess;
The name that no human research can discover--
But THE CAT HIMSELF KNOWS, and will never confess.
When you notice a cat in profound meditation,
The reason, I tell you, is always the same:
His mind is engaged in a rapt contemplation
Of the thought, of the thought, of the thought of his name:
His ineffable effable
Effanineffable
Deep and inscrutable singular Name.

Third: Recently, one of Ann's friends wrote to say that she wanted to make something for Zuperfliegen's room. She asked, "Will the theme be more Beatrix Potter or Winnie-the-Pooh?" We laughed and thought, "umm, it's more like Blaxploitation!" (Though, of the two, Winnie-the-Pooh is way more awesome than Beatrix Potter...)

Along those lines, I wanted to share with you the "official" Zuperfliegen poster, created by our incredibly talented friend, Ben Nelson:

From Zuperfliegen

Ah, what an interesting life Zuperfliegen is going to lead!

The Missed April Fool

If I were a caring and attentive blogger, I would have posted something on 1 April because (1) it was April Fools Day! and (2) it was the "due date" of Zuperfliegen!

But, in the end, I am what I am and you, Constant Reader, get what you get. And so it goes.

Anyway, no baby yet. We're still waiting. Because we liked the idea of Zuperfliegen coming forth on April Fools' Day - since we missed the opportunity of a cesarian delivery on the Ides of March - we've decided to extend the month of March. So I'm posting this on Tuesday, March 36!